The Violinist

Back in 2003, 5 year old Molly began playing the violin. The violin was a 1/16 size and looked and sounded like a toy. She tried to convince me on a regular basis that she was allowed to use the bow now, though I was well aware that Mrs Markowski would send home a letter on the day that was really the case. After her first school concert (where the big kids joined the little kids so the sound was acceptable to the ears of the audience), she was hooked.

The next year, she began taking private lessons and took off in the glow of praise and attention from Mrs M. She applied herself to her musical studies the way she did to learning to read, riding her bike, and all things she decided to be determined to do. She would stand about 2 feet from me and say  "Listen, Mama!" and squeak into my ear until I gently told her that I needed her to stand a little further away (maybe in the next room?)

When we moved to Michigan, there were a few bumps and setbacks in trying to find a teacher and she missed not having school orchestra, but when we found the very kind Mrs Kortemeyer who played with the Lansing Symphony orchestra, Molly once again found her love for violin and began to progress again. She was able to play in recitals with Mrs Kortemeyer's studio, and in 5th grade school orchestra became available again. She found herself in the position of being the best violinist in the school as most others were just learning to play. Molly has never liked drawing attention to herself and has never been competitive. The teacher would have kids compete for their chair and she pretty much had to force Molly to "win" first chair.

In Syracuse, Molly's school district put a lot of emphasis on music. Her middle school orchestra teacher was also her private lesson teacher. Mr Frakenpohl was Molly's teacher all through middle school, and one of the most steady of presences in her life during that time, as were her lesson group buddies. His unflappable nature and encouragement of music exploration fed Molly's enjoyment of playing. Around this time, listening to her practice became a joy rather than something to endure. She took charge of her own practice and I no longer had any idea what it was she was supposed to do. She and her friends would bring their instruments to one another's houses and compose songs and jam. Many times during sleepovers at our house we were treated to string trios. She auditioned and made the Syracuse Youth Symphony Orchestra during these years as well, providing her with the experience of what professional musicianship is like, and how great it is to play with dedicated and talented colleagues. Our Sunday afternoons revolved around getting Molly and her bass player friend to and from practices on the other side of town. She also made all county orchestra each year, another experience of playing with the best musicians in the area in her age group. At the end of her middle school career, Mr Frakenpohl awarded her and 2 of her friends (one the bass player, the other a fellow violinist who danced in and out of first chair with her) Outstanding Musicianship awards. Her freshman year, her private lesson teacher Ms Blount was very exacting and taught Molly the finer points of technique and Molly loved her. Her orchestra teacher Mr Mercer continued to pump up her confidence and her love of being in the school orchestra.

In Moorestown, Molly adjusted to a different kind of music program.  Molly found herself in a sea of violinists who take lesson in Philadelphia from prestigious teachers. But she quickly liked the very low key Mrs Burk,made good friends, and adjusted her expectations. Her violin teacher, Mrs. Herman, has done a good job all 3 years of preparing Molly for All South Jersey orchestra auditions; Molly has made it every year.

Tonight was the last time she will perform in one of these select orchestras and I found my emotions very close to the surface. Many, many times I have watched that blonde head shining under stage lights and bowed in concentration, long arm moving the bow in connection with the beautiful music emanating from the stage. Tonight the music was very difficult - Molly said she's never played anything harder - and the last song was so enchanting I totally got lost in it. I have been amazed and proud watching her conduct herself as a musician. I watched her change from a gawky, awkward kid who looked totally out of place on stage to a composed, calm young lady who looks like being up there is as natural to her as breathing. But this might be it? (Well, ok, a few more school orchestra concerts but not the same thing!) Violin has taken more of a back seat in this stage of life, competing more with vocal music, cross country, rigorous studies, and let's be clear, mostly her social life, and she is not going to pursue music as a career in college, so I don't know what will happen with her violin playing. Maybe intramural string groups in college? But what about after that?

Her whole life is changing anyway - nothing will ever be the same once she graduates this summer. Home will be a stopping place, not the place she primarily lives. I won't be the one she comes home to soon, not the one she'll chat about her day to. I don't know what that will be like. Part of me panicks because I can't imagine that she is really prepared for this. But that's a different post.This post is chronicling Molly's career as a violinist, to this point anyway. To marvel at this gift of my little violinist that I've been able to enjoy for the past 12 years.
*Special thanks to Grandpa and Grandma Rozelle who helped fund this musical career in the lean years.....