Making new friends is exhausting. Mentally and emotionally. Maybe because I'm such an over-analyzer and true introvert. Seriously, I'm craving time with old friends like comfort food.
It's not that I'm pining away with loneliness. I have social connections. Just not what you'd call a real, true friendship yet. One friend (who moved to North Carolina not long ago) and I have a theory that it takes two years in a place before you really have one of those. I'm more cautious now than I was in my younger years - because I learn from my mistakes. And picky -because I know what great friends are. Sometimes I secretly worry that I've reached the limit of really good friends one is allowed. That would stink, because it would means no soul sister of mine is closer than a 6 hour drive away.
I'm older and possibly wiser and actually have peace about this - those friendships will come again. I can even see the glimmers of where they might be. But sometimes, I just want to show up to Tuesday morning group (I'll bring the snack, I promise!), jaunt down to Ft. Wayne when I have a free Saturday, have my sisters up for a weekend, go out for a night with some great girls who make me laugh until my stomach hurts, have a late night heart to heart. I want to hang out with people with whom I don't have to hide my weird, sarchastic sense of humor, girls who I know love the real me. People who know my dirt and oddities. And that I can be a good friend too.
Maybe you good old friends could write me some references:"This girl is more loyal than your dog and will not stalk you." Something like that. No? I guess I'll just have to see how the next one and a half years plays out.
4 comments:
Mark me down for a reference. :)
Ditto... as long as I don't have to give up my place in your heart. <3
Hang in there Tiff... it will come. And always remember you have a friend in OH too who loves you very much and misses you. I don't know if it makes you feel any better but I used the time after we moved to get closer to my husband and kids. But I know us girls need the female friendship too. Give me a call sometime so we can catch up... then we won't feel so far away. We never did have that talk.
I'll be there soon!
Seriously, while I know it doesn't replace having a friend there, we are looking forward to coming!
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