While It Lasted

Dear little Anna started kindergarten with flair. She always somehow puts together amazingly fashionable outfits. I'm not sure how. She has a long list of BFF's. She has charmed every adult in her wake. She has been labelled gifted already. The reading specialist evaluated her and told me she is a delight and has an amazing mind. She reads on a third grade level and is getting her own reading assignments. At open house, when I introduced myself her teacher grabbed my arm and said, "oh my gosh I LOVE Anna! I LOVE her!"

All kindergartners have bumps in the beginning, and while I listened to stories of adjustment pains of others, I asked Jeff if we could have possibly escaped. He looked at me like, "I thought you were smarter than that," and assured me that Anna would take a turn at giving her parents fits.

It happened today (while he was out of town, of course, which I am sure had something to do with it). She kept telling me she was nervous about school pictures because Molly said she had a weird smile. Poor Molly was getting inwardly cursed while Anna was whimpering getting on the bus. I called Jeff to get advice about how to handle that meanie big sister. (He was in a meeting).

When Anna got off the bus in the afternoon she had HUGE red, raw circles under her eyes. It looked like she'd been at the beach all day without sunscreen. My radar detected crying and rubbing eyes; this was more than picture day jitters. Later on in the evening, posing as Hagrid (me) asking Harry (Anna) what had happened to his eyes (was it that Draco Malfoy again?), I got the story. Two days ago when it was raining, Anna ran off the bus and her teacher "yelled" at her. When my kids say someone "yelled" at them there is an entire gamut of things that could mean. Teacher warned her that if she ever saw her running off the bus again she would get a yellow card. (Yellow comes before red, which = call home).

She rubbed her eyes today because she tried not to cry. She cried anyway. She is afraid she will cry tomorrow. So she cried tonight.

We talked about why the teacher might "yell" in that situation. It is a grown-up's job to watch out for the children in their care. Sometimes a grown-up has to get stern to ensure that the children will obey the rules, because it is very important to stay safe. I assured her that the teacher still likes her (admittedly, an assumption on my part), and Anna should not worry about the teacher yelling at her. Anna replied that it is very embarrassing to be yelled at in front of everyone.

We also talked about ways not to cry tomorrow. She brought up praying. She promptly burst into tears after we prayed. We sang a nice song. Tears again. I suggested that we make a magic wand and she could pretend to be Hermione and in her head secretly cast "no crying" spells on herself or "no laughing" spells on the boys or even "no yelling" spells on the teacher. She giggled and said that was a good idea.

Yeah, well, it's my job to get that child on the bus tomorrow and help her look forward to school.

I hate this part of parenting. I wish I had Hermione's wand and spell-casting abilities. Hopefully Jeff will be able to call tonight for a chat about this (and banish this Harry Potter nonsense, you might be thinking). I remember what it was like to be a kindergartner and first grader and feel those hot tears spring to my eyes and despite my best efforts, crying anyway. I remember how embarrassing it was, and how it seemed like the end of the world to cry at school.

My apologies to Molly who, it turns out, had nothing to do with her sister not wanting to go to school today. Teacher, to you I say that we warned you not once but twice that Anna is extremely sensitive, much more than you would suspect.