Yesterday morning, I "wasted" a few hours looking at old pictures and basically doing nothing with Molly. Friday and Saturday night, I just watched basketball and ate ice cream with Jeff. I didn't knit or try to do school work while watching TV for hours.
My inclination is to lament about how much time I wasted this spring break, justify the way I spent it. Since I've been a mom, I think I have forgotten that a lot of people actually only do one thing at a time. I have acquired the habit of feeling guilty if I am not accomplishing something. Even in my leisure time I believe I should be burning calories or expanding my mind or making a gift or at least getting a tan.
This Saturday I was clamoring for an adventure. It was a beautiful day and I wanted to GO! My family wanted to stay close to home and do lots of relaxing. We just went out Saturday afternoon to a local park and attempted fishing, took a stroll, let the kids play on the playground and took Biscuit to a dog park (which he did not enjoy, but Anna did). It was exactly what they wanted to do. And it was fine. It was nice, even.
Moll loves hanging out, doing nothing with me. I want to schedule something fun for us to do together and she just wants me to sit and wade through all the forwards in her inbox with her. Really. Jeff is perfectly happy lying on the couch watching basketball for hours with his legs propped on my lap. Anna could spend what seems like eternity showing me what fashions she's conjured up for Hannah Montana or Disney Princesses or her Webkinz. These things can be hard for me to do.
Because I've lost this ability to be still, to do nothing, and really take a break.
1 comment:
This makes me worry about what I am missing mentally by not being able to breath productivity. I know there is peace in resting but who else is going to do those dishes. Okay, speaking of which, I have blog stalked you enough and I really have to be going:)
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