I complain about being a stay at home mom. Yes I do. Sometimes I think it's futile. Sometimes I think it's boring. Sometimes I think I did not live up to my potential. And always, I think I'm not particularly good at it.
This subject could be debated at length with a broad range of outcomes. All the usual arguments aside, it's not a bad deal most of the time. Today, for instance, Anna and I went over to Play Group. Play Group is when me and four other women (give or take) get together with our kids. Someone brings a snack. The kids all play. We get to talk. We used to go through a parenting book, but we don't even do that anymore. We just get to hang out with one another. I totally look forward to Tuesday mornings.
So I may not get to talk to adults too often, but when I do they are usually good friends and we can talk about anything. The kids may be total pains in the neck at times, but I love them more than just about anyone on earth and have quite a vested interest in how they turn out. Co-workers are pains in the butt too at times, right? They may not throw hour long fits in bookstores or refuse to wear the jeans you just bought them, but are they as cute as our kids? Let's face it, I had plenty of days at work where I was bored. I was convinced I wasn't living up to my potential there either. My house will always have to be cleaned and I'll always have to cook and do laundry and probably never get it done whether I'm here all day or at work all day. And while sometimes I wonder if I've forgotten what "business casual" means, don't I love it when there's a foot of snow on the ground and Anna and I get to stay in the warm house wearing our jammies and drinking hot cocoa. Yeah, it stinks to try to figure out what to do with a whiny kid on the third rainy day in a row, but I get to play outside all day with a happy one on the 70 degrees and sunny ones and call it "work".
As for the not being good at it part... I'm the only mom my kids have. Not an excuse - just have to try as best I can. In the end, the grass is always greener on the other side is the conclusion I've come to on this whole subject. Who's betting that when I've finished school and snagged that dream career I'm going to wax nostalgic about the good ole days of being at home with the little ones? (Go back and view your videos of your kids when they were littler - aren't they so much cuter and funnier than you remember them being?!) And when I have that perfect job, what's to say people still won't be condescending when I tell them what I do? I will say ... it will be awesome to get paid again!
3 comments:
Totally relate, although I've snagged the title WAHM (work-at-home mom). It's crazy living such a fragmented life: at-home there's the caretaking, the cooking and cleaning (which I don't do all that well anyway), and then there's the early morning/nap/evening rush that comes with the workin part.
I long for those weeks that I'm off the hook teaching, but never think my house is ever cleaner or that I'm cooking more during those times.
Where does the time go? Blogging perhaps?
Yeah, I feel that fragmented life part as I juggle being a student too. I hope this summer will afford me a "break" since I'm not taking classes. Though I'm moving... Still, hopefully I'll find some time for fiction novels?! Seems like the bottom line is that once those kiddos come, "free time" has a whole new meaning!
I don't see anything controversial in this...
It's great that you are able to see the positive in a sometimes negative thing. The world tends to look down on people who are "just moms" but it's actually a privilege and blessing when you have the right outlook.
I wonder if you ever read that book I recommended to you "Ordinary mom, Extraordinary God"? It is a very encouraging book.
Keep doing what you are doing... you are a great mom!
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